well for some reason i’ve got an interest in getting back into online roleplaying games. just i don’t know which one i wanna go back to. i’ve got accounts in world of warcraft, everquest 2, lord of the rings online, final fantasy XI, and god knows how many others i have somewhere. i only intend to play for a month, so WoW would be my best choice since i have two level 40 characters to return to. however , i didn’t give Lotro a good run since i only played it for a month. it was a fun game but for some reason i fell out of it. its been a long ass time since i’ve played final fantasy XI, cept every time i’ve played it i never enjoyed it. it only brought misery and annoyence. however, i’ve always wanted to like FFXI. i still WANT to like it. also , i’ve never ever had problems with everquest 2. my only problems came when i didn’t have enough time to play. definitly one of the most enjoyable games IMO. so i’ve got quite a decision to make. don’t know what i should do about it.

my money situation is getting out of hand. i’m losing money from my savings account to try and make up for bills. my boss is giving me less hours and and still not giving me the 25 cent raise i was told i would get 8 weeks ago. my father won’t file our taxes so i can get my return money. i have to buy new tires soon for my car and i need to start putting more money down on my credit card payments. this shit is falling apart. i’m not buying anything for myself. i can’t enjoy myself. i have no way to make more money. getting a new job is rediculously hard. i’m going on my 4th year with domino’s pizza.  this is starting to piss me off. i wanna goto school but i can’t get any help with it. i don’t know what i wanna go for, and i don’t know how to get money to go. i’m stuck. 

all day i’ve been feeling like shit. its getting to the point where i’m starting to crack. not having any friends is horrible. not being able to meet a nice girl and be in love is also really really heartbreaking. whats so damn hard about having these things? why do other people get them and i don’t? what am i missing? i haven’t got a clue.

this guy does a live stream at live.pirillo.com. he used to host the call for help show on tech tv back in the years. i was able to call him live to ask him a question about crossover for the mac. what i got in return was an amazing 17 rant from him where we talked about tech support questions and how people ask stupid questions and expect him to answer them. he was awsome. i feel good right now.

before i log into the world of warcraft and begin leveling my dwarf hunter named Bleebah, i thought i’d begin working on this new blogimathingy that i randomly decided to start up while i was watching Points! on the Jeff Gertsmann blog. so i’m here now, and i’ve got nothing to say really. i’m here to see how long i will not have anything relevant or important to say. it just so happens that i am a loser in life. i have no friends, no social life, and nothing to look forward to except my many wasteful hours of video game playing.

however, i hope something good can come out of this. i hope i can at least be motivated into doing something. starting a hobby is nice, sticking to it though can be down right brutal. so heres to the future. a future that may not ever exist in the way that i wish it would.

….but you never know